and how does that make you feel?

Pretty darn miserable. Oh hello ladies and gents. Since I have no such therapist to consult at this time, I will indulge my blog instead. I hope you don't mind :). For as much as I think I'm a carefree, fun-loving, adventure-seeking gal, I'm also a perfectionist. Ugh. Summer so far has been wonderful, but in enjoying my post-grad life to the fullest, I've become less and less "healthy." Allow me to elaborate:

[Lentil soup, Green salad, Sautéed green beans, Roasted potatoes, Wine]

Physically? I am just not honoring my body as much as I should. I've been in an anti-salad rut for too long now and have probably been ice cream-ing a bit too much. The treats have been good, really, really good, but they don't make me feel good. Unfermented dairy products and I just do not get along as well as we used too and sugar highs really aren't as fun as they sound. I'm a three square meal kind of girl, I know this, and yet I've been snacking non-stop for energy. Not to mention, can you believe I have not made it to my local farmer's market yet? There is just no excuse to miss out on fresh, local produce.

[Quinoa with Spinach & Artichoke hummus]

Emotionally?And I hate to admit this, I've been disappointed in myself along with the effects of my equal opportunity dining experiences. My clothes don't quite fit the same, I can't remember the last time I slept well, and my moods have been all outta whack. Holly, dear, I feel ya on the poundage. Plus, have you ever heard of that thing called the Good Mood Diet? Well, the extra food and drinks haven't exactly been keeping me happy-go-lucky. My apologies to any and all that caught me at a bad time. If only food could just be all pleasure all the time.

[Steamed brussel sprouts with crushed black pepper, Lentil soup]

Mentally? I don't like labels since I could do without the pressure and guilt, but there are quite a few food philosophies that I call my own. Like eating ethically because I want to influence change in food politics and inhumane farming practices. Or that concern about the environment i.e. the greenhouse gases produced by conventional farming and the transport of edible goods across country lines and hemisphere. Another facet, of course is that I prefer to eat the most nutritionally dense food for myself  because it will keep me alive and kicking the longest, because it will make me feel my best. Oh yes, now I remember.

These past few weeks have otherwise exceeded their expectations, but taking a cue from Angela, I believe that I deserve to be healthy, and happy, and feel as good as my heart desires. This next week, I'll be focusing on streamlining my diet with things like green juices, organic vegetables, refreshing soups, whole grains, and clean proteins. I'll probably throw an increase in exercise in the mix too. Remember when I said I was going Exhale's Core Fusion Yoga class? Well, I went, and was amazed. It was better than anything I've ever done and challenged my muscles like never before. I may once again be found at a bar watching a world cup game this weekend but I will be more conscious of my entire well being during my time there. Let's be real: no matter how balanced any of us seem to be living our lives, health is a journey, and it's one that I'm still trying to figure out.

As for the self-critical factor, I'm not willing to wait to ask her to shut up. It is not healthy, nor okay with me to feel any less than confident about who I am, what I stand for, and/or how I look. So, here are a few tips for you and I to keep in mind during this next week, courtesy of July's Allure magazine:

1. Stop apologizing. "Spend one whole 24-hour period without unnecessarily saying, 'I'm sorry.' 'People often say they're sorry when they're feeling insecure,' says Beck. Force yourself to quit, and you'll feel more self-assured."
2. Be Grateful. "Write a thank-you note, or call someone to say thanks for lunch the other day. 'People who express gratitude are happier with themselves,' says Beck."
3. Strike up a Conversation. "'Start talking to people--at the coffee shop, on the airplane, in line at the movies,' says Beck. 'Engaging with someone else will make you feel good about yourself.'"
4. Get a Blowout. "As soon as women see their hair blow out, they act differently. By the time they leave, their shoulders are back, there's a swing in their step--they feel better," says hairstylist Mark Townsend of Marie Robinson Salon in NYC. 

I'm actually getting my hair trimmed tomorrow morn! Feeling brighter already ;). 

[Cornbread with Tahini sauce, Bio red wine, Macrobiotic plate of Kabocha squash, Broccoli, Kale, Brown rice, Seaweed, and Black-eyed peas]

Last but not least, I kicked of my nourishing self-revival with a macrobiotic dinner at Souen accompanied by a former fellow intern and the newest Editorial Assistant at Fitness Magazine, Karla. Oh yum. Take care, beauties!